The Closet Door Leads to a Little Death
Anna Sisson

Now exposed, there is a kind of space, both inside and outside the mind. It is a fluid and hidden space. To live in queer space through the body, mind and environment calls for researched and discovered ways in and out. The Closet Door Leads to a Little Death talks to the out of body experience of sexual liberation; the transcendental feeling of an orgasm and the suppression of this space for queer people. All kinds of objects, images, and bodies can guide us to this space; her voice can pull you up out through the physical into a state of bliss. Welcome. Here a wish to stay has been discouraged, continually pulled back from coming here. Being burnt for honouring it. Fly up with a wooden pole between your legs and see the space for yourself. These risks have always been worth it and unavoidable for the queer body needing both earth and spirit. The need to express this mood of living calls for space. Queer space is challenged by the normative, an abusive relationship, queerness hides, but art can stand and defend, allowing suppressed thoughts space to shelter. Cumming inside as opposed to ‘coming out’, a process of heteronormativity. Queerness is a chaotic utopia of destruction and resurrection. The little death or, the brief loss or weakening of a normative consciousness, gives one’s inner world space to form an internal utopia to exist, if only for a moment. Queer space can be felt, tearing a hole in reality. The real is ever growing. Magic powers grow both imagined and real and the merging of reality into artworks let reflection, contemplation re-emerge out of queer space whilst pushing the normative into the closet. When personal experiences enter public space, connections between imagination and reality are created. Window allows for fantasies to play out in a solid setting. Pushing back through the glass to reveal a reality of queer space. Blueprints for a utopia that is both here in the flatness of the canvas and hidden in the reality of objects and space. The queer subject must exist in the present but continues to be pushed into the future. Pushing back, the unknown opens up possibilities for new ways to form a future space for those who never had one to begin with.

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